Discussion Leader #8 Luke

1) Do you think body image affects men as much as the author states?


Body image affects both sexes on a very large scale. It is more obvious in women, but like the author states it is a prominent issue for many men. Two of the men in the men's group felt that they were judged solely on the their own looks because they were large, muscular men and people acted scared like they were violent people. Norah had her own experience with male body image issue. While disguised as a man she appeared to be on the smaller side and was told while she was dating that she was not "big" enough.

2)Do you feel that Norah should have told the men's group the truth?


Norah should have revealed the truth to the group at the end of her time with them, but it is easy to see why she didn't. In the group those men shared incredibly personal emotions that they would only talk about with a select group of people. Most of the men there felt that their problems stemmed from the women in their lives and it would have been a harmful result if they found out that a women and been there to see and hear it all.


3) What were your thoughts about the spirit dance?


The spirit dance was a very interesting section of the book. For Ned it must have been a very strange experience because it was his first time with the men's group on retreat, but also because also because of he was the only women there in a all male environment. Norah's idea for her spirit dance was also very strange. When she asked one of the fellow men to cut her it was probably the oddest moment in the book.

4) What are your thoughts on Norah's eventually mental breakdown?

It was not that surprising that she had the breakdown because of all the stress that she was constantly under to maintain her disguise. She was constantly fooling people into thinking that she was a man and getting them to open up to her emotionally and occasionally physically which eventually began to destroy her. She made friends and relationships with many of the people she met and couldn't stand lying to them anymore.